


Comfortably Numb

by maesumi



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Abandonment, Anhedonia, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Author is a Clay | Dream Apologist (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Dehumanization, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Emotionally Repressed, Emotionless, Gen, Guilt, Hurt Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Pandora's Vault, Prisoner Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, Touch-Starved, if it wasn't already obvious, lol, prison fic, read!! tags!!, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-12 16:00:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29263170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maesumi/pseuds/maesumi
Summary: Days, weeks, months, years have gone by, The SMP decides It's finally enough and brings Dream out of prison. Main reason being that It is horrible and downright inhuman to keep a living person inside something like Pandora's Vault. It was something that was in debate for months before everyone came to the conclusion that Dream doesn't deserve to be locked up anymore.Though It might've been a little late for that because the person who walks out of the prison with sam is not the dream they remember.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 102
Kudos: 1237





	1. The Big Bad Villain

Dream was a manipulative psychopath, Hungry for power and control. He thought of people as chess pieces on his board, He enjoyed toying with people's emotions, their feelings, their thoughts. And he would do anything to win the game. even if he has to throw his own alleys under the bus. 

That's what the entire SMP thought of Dream when the locked the Blonde masked man away for good. He was locked in the very prison _he_ commissioned Sam to build. Trapped, in his own inescapable Vault. The server was much more calm and peaceful after that. Tommy and Sam nook built a hotel together, Niki opened her bakery again, deciding to not try and nuke tommy with jack, Sapnap and George were depressed for a short while before accepting that dream is where he deserves to be. Tubbo stepped down as the president of L'manburg, giving the position to now newly resurrected Wilbur, who in turn declared L'manburg as a nation without a ruler. Making good relations with Technoblade and Philza due to that. 

Many festivals were held, lots of celebrations took place, the server had lots of new builds on it. the community house was rebuilt, looking as good as before. There were no wars, battles or violence except for the occasional trouble Tommy would cause 

To put it simply

The server was happy, like a big family. without Dream.

Dream meanwhile, was not having such a great time being locked up in obsidian box that was surrounded by _layers_ of Lava, with little to no human interaction at all. 

The room would sometimes get so heated that the water in his cauldron would start boiling. It was hard, living in a closed box like this with no one by his side. There was nothing in there to entertain himself with except for a clock and some books Sam gave him out of pity. Out of pure desperation He would throw his clock into the lava so Sam could come to him and chat for a while. The "chat" only lasting for merely 2 minutes before the creeper hybrid was gone again, leaving Dream alone in there to rot for god knows how long. 

_It's okay_ he tells himself, _I deserve it_ and with that, he would go to sleep and wake up to another boring same day. he wishes he didn't.

* * *

_"I won't be giving you potatoes anymore."_

_he looked up and smiled "planning on starving me? that's a cheap trick sam"_

_"That's not what I meant, I finally installed a dropper system in your cell, so food will drop from there automatically. and don't throw_ _your clock into lava again, I won't be coming to replace it"_

_and with that, he turned his back and walked away. Dream stared as the lava fell back down,_

_he felt a lump in his throat as his eyes started to burn_

_"but that's worse then starving"_

* * *

And he never saw Sam after that again. He thought about throwing his clock to see if he would come or not but decided not to because chances are Sam won't

and Dream would lose his only source of entertainment

It has been a while actually, since Dream saw anyone's face. He is fine with that. They don't want to visit the Big bad villain of the Server, totally understandable. He did this to himself, he is the one to blame for his own misery. no one but himself. 

Dream wants to cry, he wants to scream and wail like a new born baby but all that comes out of him is a broken laughter at the situation he is in. He commissioned Sam to build a prison for himself, what a pleasant christmas gift. 

Dream wonders if he can use his admin powers to teleport out of prison but Sam took away his communicator and Admin tab so It's an experiment for later he guesses. 

He sits down on the obsidian ground with his back up to the wall, knees close to his chest as he wraps his arms around them and rests his chin on it, watching as the lava slowly falls, the warm golden glow caressing his skin and illuminating the room, He wonders if he'll ever see the Lava falling completely down again, making way for the other side to come in and mock him 

He wonders if he will ever see another face again. It's only been a month but to dream, It feels like years have passed. Time doesn't exist in this black obsidian room surrounded by lava. Humans are social animals, they are made to interact with each other, to talk, to feel, to walk on soft grass on a sunday morning. to hug a loved one when something exciting happens, to feel happy when your favorite raindrop wins the race on a window glass. 

Dream's eyes feels heavy as he closes them, he knows he will wake up here again, with no one by his side. He is learning to accept that fact but at least he can still imagine how his life was before this hellhole, before all the wars, before everything, right? 

Or is it dumb to run away and live in thoughts about the sweet time?

He doesn't want to lose hope

* * *

Tommy was the first and last person to ever visit Dream. how long has it been since tommy came to visit him? 2 months, 3 months, 4 months, a year? or yesterday? when was the last time he saw someone's face? heard someone's voice?, felt something other than the hard obsidian ground? he doesn't know. The clock doesn't tell him those things and he had stopped looking at the clock religiously _ages_ ago.

The only sounds in the cell are just the tiking of the clock and his own breathing. 

To keep himself from going insane, he decides to write books that sam gave him. He was not much of a writer, but he had a lot to say for someone nobody wants to listen to. that made him feel okay with writing his heart out because _no one was going to read it_ They had left him here for rot so frankly, they don't care about anything he does or has to say, 

_Right?_

Right.

Tears start pooling at the corner of his eye, he throws the quill into lava out of frustration. He thought he was in control and calm but right now, he feels anything but calm. He is clenching his hair as tightly as possible, on his knees heaving as he lets out a chocked sob

He wants to be heard, he wants to apologize, he wants to see someone, _anyone_ \- even tommy would do. He wants to go out and breathe fresh air of his SMP, he wants to touch the grass and climb trees like he used to with his friends- _friends_ Do they miss him? is he really that easy to forget? George? Sapnap? Bad? Karl? Quackity? Techno? Ant? do they really not miss him? did he really fucked up _that_ bad? 

_He can't breath_

Would they listen to him if he wanted to say something? would anyone ever visit him again? Should he try throwing away his clock to see if Sam would come? Would they forgive him if he apologized? He misses everyone. but everyone hates him.

The only sounds in his cell are the tiking of the clock and his own broken crying.

He vaguely wonders if sam would at least give him a new quill

spoiler alert: he didn't 

* * *

At some point, Dream stopped caring about what happens to his body. 

He would smash his head on the wall many times to see how many bangs it takes for him to pass out (it takes 5)

He would sometimes dip his head under the water in the cauldron and drown, confusing people on the outside

He would scratch his skin until it was a bleeding red mess, leaving a metallic scent in the air that would take days to get rid of

He would break his own hands by punching the obsidian too hard, and lastly

He would jump right into the hot lava infront of him. The warmth reminded him of Sapnap's hugs. maybe because he was born from lava. 

Dream would respawn each time with a new scar on his body and a little less sense of emotions and feelings. he no longer cared about everyone, even if he did, he couldn't cry no matter how hard he tried. Tears have just seem to be all dried up

A little part of him wants to believe, believe that he will get out of here someday and meet all of his friends again

The other part of him wished tommy had taken his last life that day at his base

And as time went one

Dream became to numb to care about anything around him.

he would wake up and live the same day

over 

and over 

and over 

again.

He lost all hope.

* * *

1 year 7 months and 23 days

That's how long it has been since they last saw dream. since they locked him up in his own inescapable prison. It has been a long time and everything is going smoothly on the server ever since Dream was locked away. But the server felt lonely, lonely without it's owner Everyone knows it was important to lock away dream, but they all would be lying if they said they don't miss the loud cheerful green hooded man before he became a complete psychopath.

but everyone has been so busy with their own stuff that no one thought of visiting Him. no visitors for over a year.

everyone had different opinions on the masked man but it all changed one day when sam said he has something important to announce. they all knew what he was going to be announcing would be related to dream. Everyone gathered in community house, looking tense and confused. The creeper hybrid cleared his throat to get everybody's attention 

"I am sorry for the sudden interruption but i have something very important to discuss with you all." he said "What is it sam?" 

Sam took a deep breath, "It's about Dream" for some reason, all of their blood ran cold at the mention of his name did he- "He escaped?!" quackity asked, others joining in

"No no no! Pandora's Vault is inescapable quackity he didn't escape" Sam stated, "Then what?" 

There was a pause before Sam continued, "I don't- I don't think that prison is the right environment for dream. Don't get me wrong! I hate him for what he did to all of you but... as his warden, I'm concerned for his health." 

George and Sapnap looked at each other with guilt in their eyes, 

"There is blood everywhere in his cell, the potatoes are all piled up in the corner, uneaten and rotting. some of his books are all ripped up to pieces and I don't think it's wrong to assume that he has resorted to self harming" Sam explained further, Guilt started to settle in most of their stomachs at this point, was locking dream away a bad idea?

"But what if he is doing all of this on purpose to get out of the prison, yk guilt trap?" Wilbur asked, none of them doubted that dream could potentially do something like _this_ to get out, but what if 

"No... he stopped seeking for attention _months_ ago, he still has the clock on his wall and he never calls for me. from what i know, he has been in that cell all alone for more than a year"

Quackity scoffed "So what? He deserves it if you ask me" The hybrid recieved a few glares for that comment

"This is downright inhumane, no one deserves to go through that" Puffy said softly as tears started to drip from her eyes, her duckling... her poor _poor_ duckling. She regrets everything now. she should've visited her poor baby but disgust and anger always held her back. she agreed on putting dream in the prison... not this.

"I don't trust that lying bastard one bit, he is probably faking it" Tommy 

"He threatened to kill me!" Tubbo 

"If what Sam says is true then I think we should let him out... his health really doesn't sound good to me" Eret

"Everyone deserves a second chance so.. i think its only fair if we give him one" Niki

At this point there were two groups formed, one that still believed in Dream and the other that absolutely despised him. They've had these debates before and it always ended with no solid answer. Sam feels guilty, and he knows what he has to do, "I am releasing Dream from the prison" silence 

They all looked at him, some with relived and happy faces and some with disgust and horror, "Are you out of your mind Sam? What if he starts the same shit again?!" Tommy yelled. Sam doesn't know who he worries about the most, He will give his life to save tommy if he have to, but Dream was an old friend, he knows what the masked man did to tommy but some part of Sam still wants to believe that dream can truly change

and after watching dream, laying there on the hard floor of his cell with strong metallic scent in the air with food rotting in the corner and with the mess that dream has became, Sam can't help but feel guilty because no one deserves _this_ sort of punishment no matter what they have done. he vaguely remembers dream saying that there will be gardens and more rooms for the prisoners to exercise and see the sun. and he changed the entire central layout just to punish dream. and if that wasn't enough, he left him there all alone, for months, _a year_

"I'm sorry tommy, but I am the warden and I decide whether Dream should be released or not." Sam said in a cold voice That only angered tommy more

"Do you not remember what he did to me in exile?! He deserves to be locked up!" and something in sam just _snapped_

He glared at Tommy, "I know exactly what he did to you tommy but what he is going through is much more vile and inhumane. you were still allowed to start anew, to roam around and breathe fresh air were you not? All Dream has been breathing is the smell of his own blood" He glared at everyone

"I am releasing him and putting him in house arrest instead, If he tries to escape then we'll see what we can do." and with that he turned his back on everyone and walked out of the community house, 

Making his way to the Pandora's Vault.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> man i just love torturing dream   
> anyways follow me on twitter @maesumi16


	2. A Better Fate

In all honesty, Sam never thought he'd ever be walking to the prison he built, to free a man who he once despised. There is still a part of him, the rational part, yelling at him to not make a stupid decision or is this even the right thing to do. but Sam can't find it in himself to listen to anyone or anything. He doesn't know if this is a right decision or not but he can't do something he'll regret later, and right now he knows he will regret it if doesn't do something about Dream

The masked man may have caused wars, destruction and deaths on the server and Sam is probably crazy for even considering this but maybe, just maybe he hopes dream has changed after all this time

So here he is, in the scary looking Vault, the platform slowly moving towards a cell that hasn't been visited in months. to a person who might not be the same as sam remembers. The platform touches the obsidian floor of the cell and lava falls behind him, sam is instantly met with the heavy metallic scent of blood in the air and the foul smell of rotting pile of food in the corner, he brings a hand up to cover his nose

Sam turns his head towards the man himself, Dream. who was lying there on the floor, unconscious, unmoving. Sam's breath hitched. 

he dashed towards the body on the ground, He kneeled down and carefully took the other in his arms, upon taking a better look sam's stomach falls into an endless pit. Dream looks half dead, Dozens of scratches on his face, his cheeks, blood pouring from the cuts on his wrists, sam wonders how he got those clean cuts before his eyes lands on the bloody paper resting beside the cauldron, eyes widening at the horrifying realization... _you've got to be kidding me._ Dream is dangerously underweight, he noticed how bony his back and shoulders feel. 

Sam also noticed how the books were scattered all around the cell, something written on each page that sam couldn't quite make out from the distance, he made a mental note to come back here to collect the books later, but right now, he needed to get dream outside to a medic, _badboyhalo_ he thought as he lifted the unconscious body in his arms carefully and made his way out of the main cell. Dream was silent the entire time

There were a lot of thoughts racing through his mind and all he could think of was how stupid the idea of putting Dream in prison was 

_he silently bit his tongue until it bled when he realized it was his idea_

* * *

To Sam's surprise, half of the server is already outside the main entrance of the prison, waiting for him. Quackity, Tommy, Tubbo and _Technoblade_ included. Sam doesn't know if they are there to stop him from freeing dream or help him save his life. If they don't cooperate than he won't hesitate to do whatever he can to keep dream safe. 

The hitched breathes, gasps and the shocked expressions on their faces when their eyes landed on the boy in his arms tells sam they may be here to help after all. 

He noticed George and Sapnap, with pained and guilty expressions, it looked like they wanted to run up to him and hug dream, to take care of their old _friend_ who they left behind all alone. But guilt held them back, they couldn't move their legs, not after knowing that they are at fault here. Sam feels sad. 

Sam wonders if they would ever forgive dream or if dream ever forgive them, would they ever be able to go back to the way things used to be? or is it too late to fix what is broken?

too late.

Sam snaps out of his thoughts, "If you're here to stop me then go ahead, I won't hes- "No" he heard a voice, Tommy he presumes 

"We are not here to stop you sam, we- um, I am sorry about earlier." Tommy said, he had a sincere and genuine look on his face which surprised the hybrid,

"Yes sam, We're sorry, well It wasn't really a good decision to lock dream up- um yeah" Tubbo was the next one to speak, Sam raised an eyebrow, 

"What changed all of your minds?" he knows, he knows exactly what changed their minds but he wants to hear them say it, he wants them to admit that they are as equally wrong and responsible for this as he is. he wants them to acknowledge it, that they did this to dream, himself included.

"Your speech about the exile and all- and the current state of Dream, he- he doesn't look too good" Guilt was filled in quackity's voice as he spoke. Sam sighed, as he zoned out, not paying attention to the people around him, still not dropping his guard, his grip on dream only tightened before he realized the other needs medical attention, _fast_

he searched for familiar friendly deng omon in the crowd, "Where's Badboyhalo?" "right here" a soft voice from the back said, everyone cleared path for bad to come forward as the demon rushed to Sam's side. He stopped before getting closer "... can i?" he asked nervously and Sam nodded 

the look on bad's face was not a promising one when he took a closer look at dream 

with a heavy sigh, Bad turned to Sam "Let's take him to badlands so i can treat his injuries" Sam nodded. 

* * *

3 hours later, Bad came out of the room looking absolutely exhausted. They all turned to him, waiting for an response on how the other's condition was. 

"So... how is he? is he okay?" Niki asked as she gently patted puffy's back who had been sobbing the entire way back. Bad takes a deep breath before starting, "He is fine for now but... I'm not really sure when he'll wake up." Sam feels his heart ache, "What do you mean?" 

"Well, all the blood loss and head injuries are going to keep him in a comatose state for who knows how long, he could wake up tomorrow hopefully, other then that... he has absolutely muffined up his left hand, 2 broken fingers and unimaginable pain" bad says "I don't Dream's previous actions, but keeping him in that ... that prison was _not_ a good idea" in a low and soft voice before walking out of the room, to get some fresh air probably, Sam thinks

The last sentence was most likely directed at him, but george and sapnap's expressions tells him they took the most damage. To say everyone was feeling guilty would be an understatement. they fucked up, fucked up big time 

and they don't know if dream will ever forgive them for what they did to him.

"They" "them" "everyone" 

Sam is lying to himself, he knows it. He was the one who suggested to lock dream up. It was his fault. The others never even considered putting dream in the prison. 

Tommy was going to kill dream that day, and maybe, just maybe if sam hadn't opened his mouth, everything would've been fine 

because Death is a hundred times **better** than what Dream went through. Maybe death would've been a more kinder fate for the masked man. 

and maybe, just maybe He would've been happier at the very least. 

but Sam ruined everything and now the man everyone hated was close to death in the next room. everyone who hated the man are desperately praying for him to wake up. and even if he does wake up, none of them are sure if he will ever forgive them 

If he will ever forgive him. 

**It's okay**

Sam sighs

He will never be able to forgive himself either

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was supposed to be a one shot... weeeeeee


	3. His Dream

_"Look! a parrot!" George flinched at the sudden loud voice_

_He looked over at dream who quietly tiptoed his way to the bright red parrot sitting on the grass they had discovered during their trip through the jungle,_

_George huffs in exhaustion "It's just a bird dream! c'mon it's getting late we have to build a shelter before mobs start spawning"_

_Dream makes a loud shushing sound at george and takes out a handful of melon seeds george didn't even know he had and carefully feeds it to the parrot, taming it in the process, the bird flies around and sits on dream's right shoulder who is practically vibrating with happiness_

_"Yes! I always wanted a pet parrot!!" he cheered, George just looked at him with a smile "I didn't know you liked parrots so much"_

_"I do! they are my absolute favorite" in that moment george compared dream to a 5 year old child who just got his favorite ice cream, the thought made him giggle_

_"well cool you got one now let's get going, bad and sapnap are so far behind"_

_'Wanna bet who reaches us first?"_

_"my money is on bad"_

* * *

2 days later, Dream woke up.

It was around 6 in the morning when his eyes flutter opened, Sapnap and george have been by his side ever since he fell in a coma, refusing to leave him alone even for a second. is it guilt? or the love for an old friend they unintentionally tortured for more then a year? who knows but whatever it is, They- no, everyone is willing to make up for it in one way or another

The news of Dream's awakening spread all around the GreaterSMP, everyone immediately rushed to badlands

no one knew what to expect, same questions popped up in everyones mind

is dream still the same? 

does he remember his home? his family? 

and most importantly 

_would he ever forgive them?_

George feels suffocated, the absolute hell that his mind has been for the past 3 days.

He was afraid, absolutely terrified that Dream might not wake up ever again. The moment the words left bad's mouth, George felt weak as his knees hit the ground, The same words repeating in his head over and over again. _Dream might not wake up any time soon or... ever_ , all because of him. he did that to dream. he left him alone when dream needed him the most. he felt a tsunami of misplaced emotions swallow him up, drowning him till he couldn't breath. 

he had opened his mouth to yell, scream, shout because goddamnit he wants to apologize to the green idiot, the bastard who always pranked him whenever he had the chance, the weird awkward boy who he had learnt to accept as his best friend,

He failed him.

he wants to apologize for failing him like this,

He wants to apologize for not listening, for not believing in him

but his voice had defied him, and not so much as a word slid past his closed throat 

next to him, he vaguely heard Sapnap let out a choking sob so unlike him that it took a moment for George to realize that, _oh sapnap was crying._ behind him, he was barely able to pick up the tiny whimpers that puffy and niki had let out. Quackity looked devastated, Wilbur was hugging tommy as he let out some tears of his own. Technoblade stormed out of the room, probably for some fresh air, yeah, guess they all need some fresh air. Sam, Punz, Fundy and a few others left the room shortly after till it was just him, sapnap and bad in the room

George just wants to call of this a big nightmare. he wants to go home

Home where his dream would be waiting for him patiently like he used to. But he knows that only exists in his memory now

Bad kneels down besides him, placing a hand on his shoulder, "There is still a chance he might wake up soon" George only felt hot tears dripping from his eyes

"I feel horrible- so so horrible bad... I did this to him" he couldn't stop his voice from breaking. it was all too much. Bad's grip on his shoulder tightens, in a reassuring and comforting way.

with a sad smile he says "It was not your fault george... If you feel horrible, let it out and move, acknowledge it, stay how long you need to and not a moment longer and then get up." 

George and Sapnap looks at him

"I'm sure he wouldn't you guys to be crying like this" 

George believed bad, he tried his best to stay strong for him, for dream, for everyone 

and after 2 days

Thank whoever is up there who answered their calls because Dream woke up! His dream woke up! It was a surreal feeling and he was so desperately trying not to lose hope and in the end it worked out because Dream was alive!, he opened his bright emerald ey- oh 

_oh_

_... his eyes were not bright anymore_

* * *

They all were ready, ready for his anger, his rage, his crying and his sadness 

what no one was ready for, was the complete calmness and lack of emotions in his eyes and overall personality, he was quiet, too quiet. he didn't say a word 

He was covered in bandages from head to toe and he might not be able to use his left hand properly for a while. Far scarier, he has been in an unresponsive impassive state ever since he woke up. Bad suspected that the oxygen deficiency down in the cell and psychological damage from the trauma of the experience were the cause of his strange state. Dream is capable of moving and talking but doesn't do much of either. It's as if all of his interest and motivation is gone and asking him to say or do anything is like asking someone to paint a landscape, who doesn't like to paint.

George feels nauseous. 

Maybe he should go to the bathroom and kneel over the toilet. Maybe he should let the dizziness take over and put him to sleep for good. Maybe he should put his hands over his ears to drown out the sound of Sapnap's crying and the sound of everyone's whimpering around him. It's all too much

He should probably be doing something 

anything. 

He is not acting like himself.

The world feels like its underwater. 

A part of him wants to be happy, happy that dream woke up

While the other part questions when _his_ dream will wake up 

What went to sleep and never woke up inside of him? 

* * *

a week goes by and Dream has been the same, Bad and puffy together volunteered to be his therapists, to try and figure out what was wrong with him. To try and undo their mistake and bring back the one person everyone miserably missed. 

Dream was still quiet, unresponsive at times. he would daze off very often which is so unlike the usually very observant blonde. His voice holds no emotion or even a slightest hint of interest which could probably rival technos on a good day.

Everything that made dream _dream_ was gone, George doesn't recognizes him 

It isn't like the dream he knew just went back into the mind it could come out again instead

It is like the Dream he got to know for the past 5 years is _dead_

So george begins to cope with this like dream has died

He has to talk to him like Dream is a completely different person because he _is,_ his personality to his interest. 

Colors look different but they don't feel different. 

What used to be his favorite meal tastes the same as what used to be his least favorite.

A cloudy day feels the same as a sunny day. 

Even his memories have no associated feelings or qualities to them. 

It's like interacting with the shell of a person fully intact, with nothing inside, or like a robot, but one with a face that reminds you in every moment that it should be a person. 

And, for the 100th time since dream's change, george sobbed 

* * *

"... what do you think about parrots dream?"

"they're okay"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love torturing the poor blob  
> also this chapter was a mess so sorry if u didn't understand something, comment down below i'll probably explain it there lmao


End file.
